I saw these great questions about Christmas on my friend, Sheila’s blog. It’s fun to share these things! Would love to hear how you do Christmas!
1. Egg Nog or Hot Chocolate?
Maybe egg nog once … I prefer coffee
2. Does Santa wrap presents or just sit them under the tree?
wrap, of course
3. Colored lights on tree/house or white?
White and pre-lit on the beautiful artificial tree; no stress
4. Do you hang mistletoe?
no, but I should
5. When do you put your decorations up?
first weekend of December; I like to enjoy Thanksgiving
6. What is your favorite holiday dish?
turkey & potatoes & gravy, then pumpkin pie
7. Favorite Holiday memory as a child?
at our grandma’s house in northern Idaho … sledding, snow angels, snowflakes on my tongue, family in every square inch of the house
8. When and how did you learn the truth about Santa?
never really did believe in Santa
9. Do you open a gift on Christmas Eve?
Growing up we opened all gifs on Christmas Eve; but did it on Christmas morning with our own children. Sometimes when t hey couldn’t stand it, we let them open a gift on Christmas Eve.
10. How do you decorate your Christmas tree?
this year … burgundy and gold balls, gold garland and always the four original ornaments for our wedding, the two kids and our very first Christmas ornament we received as a gift.
11. Snow! Love it or Dread it?
Love snow … so peaceful and pure, but but don’t wish to drive in it on long trips
12. Can you ice skate?
no
13. Do you remember your favorite gift?
clock radio
14. What’s the most important thing about the Holidays for you?
being with family
15. What is your favorite Holiday Dessert?
pumpkin pie
16. What is your favorite holiday tradition?
a new tradition that has developed since our kids have grown up and started coming “home” to our house for Christmas is everyone putting our Christmas cards to each other on the tree when they arrive. We take the time to read them all before opening gifts.
17. What tops your tree?
nothing
18. Which do you prefer giving or receiving?
giving
19. What is your favorite Christmas Song?
I’m Dreaming of a White Christmas and Joy to the World
20. Candy Canes: Yuck or Yum?
Yum!
21. Favorite Christmas Show?
White Christmas
Candy blogs: “I bring you good news of great joy that will be for all the people. Today in the town of David a Savior has been born to you; he is Christ the Lord.” Luke 2:10-11
I have so been enjoying this Christmas season. Have you? I really believe it’s because, as a friend said recently, I have purposefully built margin into my December. There is so much to do in December … all good. But if the activity doesn’t leave you time for pondering the season, have you really experienced it? Or have you just done a lot of good things?
To ponder means to consider something deeply and thoroughly; to meditate. This is tough in our culture, isn’t it? My first pondering of the season is the morning after I decorate the Christmas tree. I get up early, turn it on in the dark house and just sit and ponder … me and the tree and the Lord. And the Christmas spirit miraculously descends upon me! In the quietness and the magical light of the Christmas tree, my mind is freed to let the thoughts come forward and into the Light.
It’s important to have a place to ponder. Is it by the fire, at the dining room table with a cup of coffee, in your bedroom before you turn off the lamp at night, in your car with no radio or CD playing, folding laundry, on the treadmill? Wherever it is, I encourage you to spend some time there, especially in December. Dennis Rainey says, ‘We’re always puttering and planning and doing and moving from one place to the next but never stopping . . . and listening . . . and recharging . . . and pondering.”
December is the time we reflect on and celebrate the birth of our dear Savior. Simply performing familiar rituals and traditions and singing Christmas carols and giving to the needy won’t take us all the way there. Our spirit must make a connection with His spirit. “The Spirit himself testifies with our spirit that we are God’s children.” Romans 8:16 When we take the time to allow that to happen, God floods in and we can bask in a fresh awareness of what He did for us when He came to Bethlehem. Our perspective changes. We remember what is truly important and of eternal value.
Enjoy the fun, familiar things of an American Christmas season! But build in some margin and spend some of that margin pondering the glorious coming of Jesus Christ to earth so we can be called children of God.
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Candy blogs: I often describe myself as a “moment catcher.” I have a passion for etching special moments into my mind (and my camera) to be enjoyed again and again. Our lives are made up of “moments.” When you add them all up, they are our life. They are all we really have, and when we’re gone from this life, they will go with us unless we have taken the time to bring the moments to life by taking photographs and journaling our experiences and thoughts.
The holidays bring up the strongest desire to recall and create moments … the familiar … the traditions … being with our loved ones. The weather, the music, the smells, the foods … they all bring up special moments from the past. We love to re-live them; we even re-create them for our children. The weather has turned colder and that makes us turn inward. Some moments just happen on their own. But others are created. I just enjoyed looking at some photographs of a friend with her first grandbaby. Now there are some MOMENTS, huh?! I’m grateful that someone thought to snap a picture. But even if there was no picture, the story can still be told in words. In fact, pictures are pretty much worthless without the stories that go along with them. So it really comes down to words. We can have all kinds of moments tucked in our memories but unless we turn them into words, our moments … our lives … will most likely fade after the next generation.
“The palest ink is better than the sharpest memory.” Chinese proverb
This from my company’s website: “When the economy is in strife, when the immediate future isn’t abundantly clear, people are drawn to the comfort of their homes. It’s called cocooning, as coined by renowned marketing consultant and futurist Faith Popcorn.
Popcorn’s recent “Culture of the Recession” survey found that 72 percent of respondents are spending more time at home. “What it means is the next iteration of cocooning – uber-cocooning – will see people retreat to their homes as the safe haven from the increasingly threatening outside world,” Popcorn says.
As with other periods of uncertainty on the national and global scale – past recessions, the attacks of 9/11 – people tend to assess their lives and focus on what’s truly important. And family, memories and connecting with others are often what people value most.”
This is the perfect time to put some words to your moments. You are spending more time inside with your friends and family. We’re in the holiday season between Thanksgiving and Christmas so our moment antennae are running at high frequency. What are you thinking about?
I’m thinking about leaning way forward in the car to catch the first glimpse of the lights from Grandpa and Grandma’s house after a very long drive, the candy and caramel popcorn grandpa would have waiting for us, the fudge and pies that Grandma had hidden all over the house to be brought out at strategic times, the four part harmony of family singing, the games of Jotto and Dominos and Battleship, the bountiful meals, the endless hand dishwashing, the sledding, the snow games, the wooden rack set up over the wood heat register from the scary basement for our wet hats and gloves and socks, the creaky stairs that led to the playroom with antique toys, the programs put on by all the grandkids, the presents, the chaos, the laughter … the utter contentment. Christmas at my grandparents’ house was like being under a magical spell. We literally lived all year to get to Christmas in northern Idaho. And we cried for miles when we had to go back home. Can you see all that in this picture?
Christmas in Northern Idaho, 1974
Don't let the moments of your life go unnoticed and unheard. Think about them, write them down and share them with those who matter to you. Be a moment catcher. It’s catching!
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An invitation to ACT upon the truth from God that is brought home to your soul.
“It’s not enough to read the cookbook. Eat the meal.” Adrian Rogers
I haven’t posted for quite a while. I have several posts started but haven’t been able to make up my mind which idea to actually post! I’ve been slightly paralyzed. Recently, I’ve been sensing the wooing of the Holy Spirit, drawing me to a deeper path yet again. I have taken some major steps of obedience in the last year and half, but a couple of weeks ago I read the following and was stopped dead in my tracks. I immediately knew what my next steps were to be.
From MY UTMOST FOR HIS HIGHEST
The Authority of Reality
Draw nigh to God, and He will draw nigh to you. James 4:8
It is essential to give people a chance to act on the truth of God. The responsibility must be left with the individual, you cannot act for him, it must be his own deliberate act, but the evangelical message ought always to lead a man to act. The paralysis of refusing to act leaves a man exactly where he was before; when once he acts, he is never the same. It is the foolishness of it that stands in the way of hundreds who have been convicted by the Spirit of God. Immediately I precipitate myself over into an act, that second I live; all the rest is existence. The moments when I truly live are the moments when I act with my whole will.
Candy’s comments: Isn’t that amazing?! You might want to read that again to get the full impact. To me, the key phrase in that paragraph is “the paralysis of refusing to act leaves a man exactly where he was before …” That’s how I’ve been feeling lately. I had come as far as I was going to come without taking a new path.
But I know I want to truly LIVE. I don’t want to stay where I am. It will require some new changes. For me that means several things:
1) paying more attention to my calendar and not letting other things interfere with my water aerobics. I have been “pretty” faithful to my exercise but, when I think about it, I have scheduled some fun girlie outings on my days off and haven’t replaced the exercise time. I had stopped losing weight and was wondering why. This is why.
2) spending more time reading the Bible. I’ve been reading books about speaking and studying social networking and making connections and preparing for kicking up my speaking ministry. But I have let this preparation move in on my personal time with God and His word. It’s time to rein that in.
3) lessening my caloric intake. Ouch, I don’t like that one. But I am really sensing it’s time. I’ve taken improving my health in steps and, apparently, it’s time to take the next one.
… the moments when I truly live are the moments when I act with my whole will. I don’t want to just exist spiritually; I want to really live.
Consider what the Holy Spirit may be wooing you to. What changes are you sensing He wants you to make?
Never allow a truth of God that is brought home to your soul to pass without acting on it, not necessarily physically, but in will. Record it, with ink or with blood. The feeblest saint who transacts business with Jesus Christ is emancipated the second he acts; all the almighty power of God is on his behalf. We come up to the truth of God, we confess we are wrong, but go back again; then we come up to it again, and go back; until we learn that we have no business to go back. We have to go clean over on some word of our redeeming Lord and transact business with Him. His word “come” means “transact.” “Come unto Me.” The last thing we do is to come; but everyone who does come knows that that second the supernatural rush of the life of God invades him instantly. The dominating power of the world, the flesh and the devil is paralysed, not by your act, but because your act has linked you on to God and His redemptive power.
Candy’s Comments: This paragraph tells me that the intensity of our walk depends on the intensity of our obedience. When we are finally ready to transact business with God Almighty and come to Him, it is the result of choices we’ve made along the way. When we actually come, we are acting on the truth that’s been revealed to us. And that act unleashes the power of God in us! That’s a great, big wow, isn’t it?!
When we are sensing that God Himself is speaking to us about something, it’s serious business. It shouldn’t be something we put on the back burner for when we have more time or when we get around to it. When you think about it, when we don’t act on the truth we know, it’s like telling God that everything is more important than He is at the moment. Where do we get off doing that?! Hello?
Sometimes we don’t get the whole picture as He’s speaking. That’s why writing it down is important. As you look back through the things you’ve been learning, you will see a pattern. Eventually you’ll see the picture God wants you to see. And God’s power will flow through you to impact the Kingdom … until He calls you to take the next new step.
I’m movin’ on down the road. Come on along.
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“When the sun goes down below the horizon, he is not set; the heavens glow for a full hour after his departure. And when a great and good man sets, the sky of this world is luminous long after he is out of sight. Such a man cannot die out of this world.” Beecher
Sunday, October 25 marks the 12th year since my beloved grandfather, Rev. Kenneth R. Bertholf, passed away. This saying was on the cover of his funeral program. It seemed so fitting. But when I created it and his obituary, I struggled with trying to condense 92 years into a few paragraphs. How can one do justice to a whole lifetime on a single piece of paper?
Grandpa Ken was born in Tekoa, WA on April 28, 1905, one of ten children. He was quite an athelete and especially loved baseball … the Braves. He was also a country musician. He had a wonderful bass voice, and played the fiddle, guitar, steel guitar and harmonica. (Would playing the washtub in a kitchen band also count?) He was an old time lumberjack, short order cook, insurance salesman, vitamin salesman and carpenter.
When he was 29 years old, he became a Christian and felt called to be a minister of the Gospel. He married my grandmother, Blanche Payne, in 1935 and they spent the next 46 years planting, building and pastoring churches around the northwest.
But these are only public and general details “about” my grandfather. They don’t tell you about the kind of man he really was …
As a young child, I lived with my grandparents on a church campground in the mountains of beautiful northern Idaho for two years, and spent every summer with them until I was a senior in high school. I have wonderful memories of long, lazy summers in their home. Almost every evening after dinner, I would sit on my grandpa’s lap to hear stories from God’s Word, the Bible. Grandpa loved the outdoors and took my brother and me on long hikes in the woods on Sunday afternoons. He showed us the needles of different pine trees; some had two, some had three, and some had five separate needles. Then he would run them through his mouth, and no matter how many strands it started with, they would all form one strand, one complete needle. He wondered at this simple miracle. He whittled us whistles out of sticks and told us we should never try to outrun a bear! He taught us the parts of the flower and how to blaze a trail through the woods. He used to jump over picnic tables and kick the tops of doors well into his 60’s. We played math games and made snow angels and went sledding. I’ll never forget his silly Indian talking and dancing. He always had a huge garden and we loved the fruits of his labor! But by far our favorite activity with Grandpa was sitting at his feet while he sang his cowboy songs with his guitar and harmonica.
Yet even more important than these more intimate family things, was the fact that Grandpa loved people to Jesus. He was always the center of attention; children and young people flocked to him. He always had a silly joke or a silly song or a silly face. He made people laugh and feel comfortable. You always knew when he was in the room. He had a special love for those who didn’t know Jesus and led many to Christ over his lifetime. It was his passion. Through his sacrifices of time and salary and worldly possessions, God used him mightily to change the lives of thousands of individuals and families. His life was always focused on others.
My grandfather was always the one unchanging presence in my life. As a child, he gave me the stability I needed in my very unstable world. After his passing, I felt rather alone and adrift … unanchored. I had so depended on his predictability and steadfastness for my strength. Grandpa had become my father image. Because of him, I knew that God, my heavenly Father, was wonderful and loving. But I have remembered what he taught me about God: that He is the only one from whom I can draw lasting strength and peace and direction. Because my grandfather loved and mentored me every summer, I grew up to realize that God alone was the one immovable and unchanging force in my life.
Grandpa was 92 when he died; he said that 92 was old enough to die. He was ready for heaven. I will always carry a part of Grandpa Ken inside me. I especially miss him at this time of year. But I remember what he taught me and who he pointed me to.
Kenneth Ross Bertholf … a great and good man.
“Let this be for a future generation, that a people not yet created may praise the Lord.” Psalm 102:18
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Thank you to all who have been asking about my speaking trip this week! God was in the house!
There was one decision for Christ! I am so excited for this. She was a high school girl and sat right next to me at the table. Be sure to pray for her as the gals in Pocatello follow up to encourage her to be part of a Bible Study and find a church to learn about her new journey.
I am also excited about how the Lord confirmed the topic and the message. The outline for this message flowed out in about 30 minutes. I knew it was inspired. The women indeed related to being “out of money, out of time and out of strength.” And, as always, God took it to places I never imagined in the hearts of women. My conversations with women after each luncheon were moving and inspiring.
I love sharing my heart with women! But I knew by how tired I was afterwards that I had been doing spiritual battle. I slept almost all the way home to Boise, on and off throughout the evening and until about 8 a.m. this morning. This is exactly why I have a team of prayer warriors! This ministry cannot be done without the powerful prayers of God’s people behind it. My heart is so grateful; I am always amazed and humbled by it.
As you may have noticed, I have adopted this quote by Kay Arthur:
“You are accountable only for your gifts and ministry. Don’t look at the effects and evaluate yourself or your gifts on that basis. Gifts are from the Spirit, the ministry is from the Lord, and the effect is from God — your responsibility is simply to be faithful.”
Kay Arthur
I pray He always finds me faithful.
Choosing joy!
Hello everyone.
I ask for your prayers as Scott heads out with me to eastern Idaho to speak for two Stonecroft Ministries Women’s Connection luncheons. As always, my first priority is that women will be saved as they hear the Gospel. My second priority is that young families will hear the cry of my heart to slow down and simplify their lives.
Thursday, Oct. 14 Idaho Falls, Idaho at noon MDT – Red Lion Inn
Friday, Oct. 15 Pocatello, Idaho at 11:45 a.m. MDT – Red Lion Inn
Blessings!
(Facebookers … sorry for the double whammy here. I’ve already posted on FB; this is coming from my blog.)
www.candytroutman.wordpress.com
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- Estes Park, CO 1985
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- Aurora, CO 1984
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- My beautiful daughter
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- the women of faith who came before
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- I call it an “Omer Bag”; leaving a legacy
My daughter recently celebrated her 26th birthday! So today I want to celebrate mothers and daughters! There is nothing in life like the mother-daughter relationship. A mother teaches her daughter to be a woman. She passes on the joy of family, of relationships, of being a woman and making a purposeful mark on the world. Every woman is a daughter.
“The moment a child is born, the mother is also born. She never existed before. The woman existed, but the mother, never. A mother is something absolutely new.” ~Rajneesh
A STRONG LEGACY
“Of all the haunting moments of motherhood, few rank with hearing your own words come out of your daughter’s mouth.” ~Victoria Secunda
I often hear Abbey saying my silly words: “whatserschnauzer” or “oh, my stars!” You have your own list of “mom sayings”. We do want to leave a true legacy for future generations, not just the silly words or phrases we often say. The definition of legacy is something handed down from an ancestor or a predecessor or from the past.
A local funeral home used to run this commercial on the radio:
“Memories are a way of holding on to the things you love, the things you are, and the things you never want to lose. Remembering a summer rose in December, or the laughter of a child. The flicker in your eyes when you see an old photo. Memories of family and friends are our own books – the stories that celebrate the wonder that is life. EVERY LIFE LEAVES A LEGACY.”
What kind of legacy will we leave? One way to leave a meaningful legacy is to keep remembrances of the milestones in our lives. In Exodus 16:32 Moses said, “This is God’s command: ‘Keep a two-quart jar of it, an omer, for future generations so they can see the bread that I fed you in the wilderness after I brought you out of Egypt.’” (manna)
I have a little velvet drawstring bag that belonged to my great Grandmother. I specifically asked for it when she passed away. Inside are little trinkets from her childhood, meaningless when they were new but priceless to me generations later. I had my sister in law make two bags just like it … one for me and one for Abbey. At Abbey’s bridal shower last year I gave a talk about the faith and strength of the women who came before her in our family and gave Abbey her own “omer bag.” I put a couple of trinkets in it to get her started. She will have a lifetime to decide what to put in it. The second bag was for me. It will be part of my legacy to my daughter and her daughters and their daughters.
A HEARTSONG
So after all this legacy-building, we eventually send them off into the world to be those happy, healthy, confident, giving PEOPLE we dreamed for them to be. But they can’t just remember where they came from, they have to know where they’re going.
“We mothers are learning to mark our mothering success by our daughters’ lengthening flight.” ~ Letty Cottin Pogrebin
I also want to give my daughter a good start on her “heartsong.” I love this word/phrase! What is a heartsong? Some might call it a mission or purpose. But Mattie Stepanek more accurately used the term your heartsong. Mattie was the young boy who many of us came to know on The Oprah Show before he died in 2004. One day, Mattie was talking to his mom and he had on a sweatshirt with a music maker sewn inside. As he leaned across the table, it activated and a melody came out. He said, “Mommy, listen! That’s my heartsong!” He later defined a heartsong as, “what we are called to offer others … what we hope to be remembered for.”
Your heartsong gets you through the tough times. If you are overwhelmed or tired, it gives you confidence, and makes you act. Abbey, I hope your heartsong reminds you of the confident, joyful being God created you to be. And I hope it reminds all of us to be inspired by our own lives and heartsongs … enough to inspire others, and especially our daughters. Our legacy and heartsong have everything to do with theirs.
“Do not forget the things your eyes have seen or let them slip from your heart as long as you live. Teach them to your children and your children’s children.” Deut. 4:9
“Future generations will be told about the Lord. They will proclaim his righteousness to generations yet unborn— for he has done it.” Psalm 22: 30b-31
Today’s Headlines:
Is Your Home’s Value Sinking?
Poor, Poor Billionaires: America’s wealthiest lost $300 billion
Quake Traps Thousands
Division Over Afghan Strategy
Bank of America’s CEO Leaving by Year’s End
Taking Aim at God on “Blasphemy Day”
Amber Alert Issued for Missing Newborn
Stocks Struggle at Quarter End
It would be easy to give in to the headlines, wouldn’t it? But God also has some things to say.
“So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.” Isaiah 41:10
“Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? Come to me. Get away with me and you’ll recover your life. I’ll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with me and work with me – watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace.” -Jesus (Matt. 11:28 – The Message)
We have other choices and options than complaining and worrying and allowing the world to invade the sanctity of our family’s life. No matter the outside circumstances, our homes still need to be places of peace and safety. Our homes should be safe havens from all the stress and pressure we endure “out there.”
One way to do this is the long lost family activity … the family dinner. Here are some thoughts from a couple blogs and websites I’ve enjoyed.
From Dine Without Whine:
How often does your entire family gather around the security of your dinner table to enjoy a home-cooked meal, relax, and share about your day?
Facts That Can’t Be Ignored…
- The average parent spends 38.5 minutes per week in meaningful conversation with their children. (A.C. Nielsen Co.)
- Family dinners are more important than play, story time and other family events in the development of vocabulary of younger children. (Harvard Research, 1996)
- Frequent family meals are associated with a lower risk of smoking, drinking and using drugs; with a lower incidence of depressive symptoms and suicidal thoughts; and with better grades in 11 to 18 year olds. (Archives of Pediatrics and Adolescent Medicine, 2004.)
- Adolescent girls who have frequent family meals, and a positive atmosphere during those meals, are less likely to have eating disorders. (University of Minnesota, 2004)
From E-Mealz:
Goal #1
Spending time with your family
Goal #2
Save time and money
Goal #3
Serve delicious food
Goal #4
Save yourself from multiple and last minute trips to the grocery store
Goal #5
Stare at your children across from the dinner table rather than into the
pantry looking for a dinner idea
Just give it some thought. Do a little extra planning. Cut out some extra activities. Enjoy some home and family time together over a simple meal. Sharing meals invites conversation, also a lost art these days. You’ll find out a bunch of stuff! And don’t watch so much news.
Let me know how it goes.
http://www.familylife.com/site/apps/nlnet/content3.aspx?c=dnJHKLNnFoG&b=3882207&ct=5007881
I love this article by Barbara Rainey on Family Life Today! (I would copy it here but don’t want to violate copyright laws. So please follow the link to read the article.) I get a daily email about marriage from Family Life and they are very encouraging.
My ears are burning from listening to women talk about their husbands and families. Since when is it all about the children? I was taught that a married woman’s priorities should be 1-2-3 God, husband and then children. Most Christian women will say they believe this but their lives tell a different story.
When we first fall in love and marry, it’s all about our man. Vows, dreams, spending time, conversation, being close … we start building a life together. Then children come along. So often I watch women allow their children to consume their identities. They function in mommy mode and forget about wife mode. And they expect their husbands to understand and be satisfied with the arrangement. No babysitters because something might happen, calling home during a night out to check on things, no overnights away, treating their husbands like babysitters instead of parents, endless children’s activities without scheduled “couple” time, etc. Over time, these things take a toll and can kill a marriage. It’s called neglect.
Our children need to see us loving each other in tangible ways. They need to watch a good marriage being modeled for them. Our sons and daughters learn how to treat their future spouses by watching how we do it. And, let’s face it, our kids need a break from us, too! The purpose of parenting is to teach and train them to become independent adults. This doesn’t start when they graduate from high school. It’s dozens of daily decisions and lettings go.
Save some of your energy for your husband; he is your number two priority. He can make you feel beautiful and sexy. He can make you feel safe and secure. He can make you feel cherished and adored. And he wants to if you can spare the time. Treated with respect and care, he will do all these things for you. Your children cannot. When they are grown and gone, it will be the two of you again. Having a healthy marriage when the empty nest comes takes intentional nurturing.
So our todays reflect what our tomorrows will be. Today does matter. Love on your man!
www.candytroutman.wordpress.com
